Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
