Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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