I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Randomize
