ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
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