I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Randomize