We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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