Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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