I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
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