i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
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all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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