Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
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