GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Reggie can tackle my bush.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
