i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
