well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
