Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
