I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
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