lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Randomize
