are you still at the devil's house?
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
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