I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
