Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
