Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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