She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
