I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
So gin and wine won't be happening again
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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