I don't think brook has ever known best
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
my being single is dangerous.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
