people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Randomize
