a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
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