Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
