The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
