Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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