After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
