Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
