Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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