You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
