Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT