yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
