Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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