Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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