i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
