white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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