Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
