please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
