Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
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