my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Please, let me fuck your mom
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
We left an ass print on the piano.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
