we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
