just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize