oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
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