DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
