i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Randomize
