I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
