covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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