Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
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My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
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Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
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