the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
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