im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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